Discovering Perfect Love

Discovering Perfect Love

by Laura Montoya mother of Jules Montoya '18

Leaving the house can be a chore sometimes as we realize one of our shoes is missing. It is never in the place it is supposed to be and it is always just one shoe. As we frantically look for the lost shoe, we know exactly who was behind it: Lucy our dog. She is a shoe thief. After we find the missing shoe and finally walk out the door, Lucy escapes and runs down the street. The joy on Lucy's face as she happily trots down the street leaves no room for anger. We chase after her and bring her back inside so that we can leave, knowing that when we get back, Lucy will be there to welcome us home.

The love our dog has for us is unquestioning and it is loyal and it is well, perfect, even as she plots her next shoe heist. The perfect love our dog has for us is not in competition and does not have to look a certain way. It is a perfect love that sits quietly with you on the sofa, or nuzzles next to you while you sleep. What a gift we have in our beloved animal friends that they so freely give their unwavering love to us.

I started to think about the lines of my own love, especially the love that exists in my faith, devoted to a God that exists only in our hearts. What does perfect love mean? Perfect love has always been something I have struggled with. For so long I saw "perfect" as a negative word. How could I ever say that I am perfect? Who do I think I am?! So I reflected a lot to come to terms with the word. I started by asking myself, what is Christian perfection? I am not a perfect person so how can I be a perfect Christian?

I love a God that doesn't respond to emails nor can He come over for dinner and gush about my famous tostadas, yet I call this God my friend. His number is not in my phone yet I still call Him, even as I wait to hear back from Him, my love does not waiver. It is in that love that I experience my own perfection.

I realized this isn't a perfection to hold over others but rather a perfection that exists in how we love. It was then that I discovered that my greatest loves are in my friendships and connections with people. As with most of our human friends, they are there for us when we need to talk to someone, cry or celebrate. My friendship with God is the same.

When I stand up for others I know that God is supporting me by giving me the courage to stand with the voiceless and oppressed. He pushes me to walk farther and speak louder.

When I traveled to Ecuador as a teenager to be with patients that were suffering from leprosy, God was holding my hand so that I wouldn't fall apart from sadness at seeing their plight. He made me strong so that I could be with my new friends and in that friendship hold His hand. He opened my eyes and expanded my heart on that journey. We grew closer.

When I am blessed with generosity and understanding from others, I see God in them. We all have the same friend.

Most recently when I said hello to an elderly woman at a museum, God was there too. The woman told me about the dress she made herself, and went on to tell me more about her long and amazing life. I listened. We talked for half an hour and as those minutes passed, I was filled with happiness. While I may never see this person again, we both decided to give our time up for each other and in that connection, I saw my friend. I didn't get to text God and tell him about the amazing person I met but that didn't matter because He already knew. He was there.

When I laugh with my daughter, I know God fills our hearts with so much love that I sometimes feel as if I could explode! It is in these moments of empathy, kindness, generosity, and love that our friendship with Him grows and our own perfection is discovered.